Can You – Should You – Attempt to Bring Back a Time?

photo credit: Lise1011 Passing time via photopin (license)

Have you ever seen the movie, Splendor in the Grass? It’s with Natalie Wood and her character is in love with Warren Beatty’s character. Yet, the relationship doesn’t work out due to their parents viewpoint of the relationship and Natalie’s character ends up dealing with a mental breakdown amidst her heartbreak.

Well, it’s a movie I watched several years ago and one poem quoted by Natalie Wood in the movie has stayed with me then and does now. The poem is called “Ode on Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood” by William Wordsworth. And the part Natalie Wood reads in the movie (at the beginning and at the end) goes, “Though nothing can bring back the hour of splendor in the grass, glory in the flower, we will grieve not, rather find strength in what remains behind.” Anytime I am met with this idea of recreating a previous good experience and it doesn’t work out, I remember this quote. It’s one of my favorites, actually. (Check out the rest of the poem here).

Not to mention, there’s scripture from the Bible I’ve read that jumped out at me (God’s nudge to me, I’m just know it) that is in Ecclesiastes 7:10, “Do not say,“Why were the former days better than these? For you do not inquire wisely concerning this.”

So, this all came to me tonight as I was looking back over my blog, attempting to read and comment on blogs I used to be more faithful visiting and getting familiar in this blogging community again. It used to be so much easier for me and my removal from it was due to a variety of circumstances. Personal life stress, a general feeling of losing interest, my writing changing, me changing, writing communities changing, you name it. Sometimes…things just change.

But coming back to it has felt foreign to me. It feels a little bit like I’ve grown beyond it, yet I’ve never been able to let this blog go. I was looking back over some old posts tonight and am proud of the work I did when I first started. I was energetic, hopeful, and creative in my approach to writing about writing. I started this almost 7 years ago, can you believe that? I talked about my inner child, inspired others, talked about fear,and weaknesses. I even did a writing prompt weekly that inspired others.

I am trying to bring this blog back as well as bring myself to a better place with my own writing. Can I recreate the energy that I had for this blog seven years ago? No, likely not. First of all a lot has changed in my life since seven years ago. I’ve changed, gotten older, matured. I’ve also rediscovered and renewed my Christian faith and my relationship with God is closer than ever before. Things change. And change isn’t necessarily bad. I don’t want to go back.

So, while I may not be able bring back that hour of splendor in the digital grass, I’ll have to find strength in what remains behind. I can’t look back at the early days of this blog and wonder why it was so much better. It was just different for me then as it is for me now.

Today begins something new. I’m not sure what it is and maybe next week I’ll be talking about this same subject again. But I’m here now and I’ll try. I’m feeling called to, so we’ll see where this goes.